I idolized you in a deep way before knowing you.
I saw your power over people,
The way they watched you,
The way you spoke to them.
I surrendered to bending over in the wake of your
Status like blades of grass amongst the airborne of our planet,
Seedlings and insects and clouds.
I do not pretend to fail to realize my calculated error.
I remember how empty I felt getting high off of secondhand smoke on your couch and
I remember with dulling, numbing disappointment waking up on the wrong side of the bed.
You never tried to know a thing about me and honestly I
Never wanted to know you.